vibe- http://go.magik.ly/ml/4gn1/
Wanna bust open the green-eyed monster. I’m talking about envy, but while we’re at it, let’s tackle insecurity, doubt, jealousy, fear, a history of betrayal, and abandonment issues, too, shall we?
So when we envy what someone else has…. it’s because we are coming from a place of lack. We’ve stopped focusing on all that we do have, and have become obsessed with what we don’t, and with what others do. When we’re envious, we fear that someone else has taken up our space in the sun. Now our chance is gone, because the sun can only shine on that other person, and any hopes we may have had are dashed, and we never get any breaks, anyway, and maybe we just have really bad frkn karma. Or maybe that other person is a cheating lying whore who’ll stop at nothing to get what s/he wants. The green-eyed monster is not very pretty, and it has bitter breath, too. It gets in our heads and tells us tales of how we don’t measure up and probably never ever will, and you can choose to feed the monster with your fear, or you can send it far far away…give it the boot- back to that in a bit.
Jealousy is a very close cousin of envy. We worry that someone else may have something we don’t. We doubt our own value. We feel threatened and insecure, and we focus on our perceived weaknesses. We sit and dwell on what could happen. Jealousy makes us sick, and if we let the sickness grow, the symptoms are ugly af. Jealousy makes you questioned your loved ones. Jealousy whispers that what you treasure most could be stolen from you. You can feed that fear, or you can send jealousy packing, too. But I’ll get back to that.
You may have a history of having been disappointed, unheard, disrespected, betrayed Maybe you put up with treatment you never thought you would. Maybe it happened later in life, at the hands of the first person you really, truly fell in love with. Maybe you think everyone cheats, simply because everyone you’ve picked has cheated. Maybe you’re so worried about being left or betrayed, you bend over backwards to be perfect so that there’s no way your current partner would do those things to you, but they don’t get to really know you that way, either. And you know that they don’t, so the relationship won’t be satisfying, anyway. You’ll be “perfect” for them, and unfulfilled.
Listen when we doubt our own worth, it’s because some deep part of us thinks we might not be truly lovable. There’s something in us that believes we might be easy to leave, or disrespect. Let me circle back, here. How do you send doubt, fear, envy and jealousy packing? You pick up your mind and direct it toward all the things you do have. You remind yourself that there’s only one you. Something like over 6 billion people on the planet, but only O N E of Y OU. You remind yourself that you have people in your life you love beyond words. You have your health. You have people in your life who know you and see you and love and cherish you. You have a particular, gorgeous song to sing. You have a beautiful, loving heart, and you have gifts only you can share. If you start to train your mind on all that abundance, the nasty ass green eyed monster will climb out of your head and sllllllide off your chest and vaporize before you so you can breathe again.
Please please be very mindful about what you’re feeding yourself. When you’re feeling vulnerable and insecure, try not to push those feelings away, see if you can lean into them, and find the source of your doubt and fear. What’s really bothering you???? What’s happening now, and is it something that happened long ago, that pierced you and made you doubt your own beauty?
If you find yourself trolling around on the net….feeling sick because everyone’s statuses are positive, everyone’s pictures are shiny and insta-perfect, and you feel like diving in a hole with a bag over your head–JUST try to breathe. We all have those days. EVERYONE YOU ENCOUNTER HAS P A I N. Most people don’t put that stuff in their updates. Turn it off go for a walk.
. You are not here to chase after people who don’t see you.You are not here to worry that you aren’t good enough. You are not here to convince anyone else of your worth. You are not here to be in relationships with people who make you feel sick, wondering if you’re going crazy, or if it’s them. You really aren’t. Life is too short for all of that. If you’re not sure you’re lovable, you’ll save yourself a lot of time, energy and heartache if you deal with that doubt before you try to do anything else, like be in a relationship….. Those things are hard enough to do when we feel good about ourselves. It’s near-impossible when you’re riddled with self-loathing and anxiety.
Wishing you peace, strength, tons of love and the ability to focus on everything that is right and good about you. There’s a lot.
